Perfect Timing

BBC Radio 2 News Report - Wednesday April 8th 2009:

'Security forces have regained control of the presidential palace buildings but tensions remain high in the Moldovan capital Chisinau after mass protests and demonstrations following the victory of the incumbent Communist Party in the recent general elections. The British Foreign Office advises against any immediate travel to the area.'

I am travelling to the area. Fairly immediately.

Even by my supremely chaotic standards, travelling to Europe's poorest and most corrupt country the week after a general election may have merited a little more consideration. With a sense of timing more prone to disaster than a wheelchair-bound lemming about to launch off a 60m alpine ski jump, I must have somehow known that a random group of 10,000 communism-intolerant Moldovan mofos would decide to complain about not being able to get an extra Sweet & Sour Chicken McNugget Dip just before I decided to grace the country with my presence.

With the cherry trees in blossom and its welcoming Mediterranean climate, Malta is a nice place to visit in April, or so I am told. But somehow, the ancient Saxon citadels of Transylvania, the breakaway republic of Transnistria and hordes of rioting Moldovans just sounded more 'happening'.

Hmmm, the news must be overreacting. I pick up my reading material to reassure myself:

'Whether you are a lifelong resident or a fresh-faced visitor, submitting to police shakedowns for bribes is a fact of life in Moldova.', the Lonely Planet guidebook to Romania & Moldova begins, rather promisingly. Having read the two remaining pages in the 'Dangers & Annoyances' section, I am no longer merely concerned with the potential financial extortion that may await me. No, a combination of the rabid packs of wild dogs, urban bears, gypsy bandits or organ thieves should be more than enough to cut me in my prime. No wonder Dracula is a myth in these parts, he plainly bit off more than he could chew...

But the reality of my mission is simple and beautiful: I have a burning desire to explore every square millimetre that this planet has on offer. And on the eve of my trip, I feel so electric that I could boil the kettles of a thousand teas. I have been hiding in the bushes for far too long. I am about to sneak out of the darkness and crawl on my hands and knees, getting my jeans dirty with the soil of curiosity. I will shuffle up to the window, pause for a moment, then open it gently, quietly and unnoticed. And I will look inside, and discover with wonder and awe a new world with the enthusiasm of an innocent child.

I am about to hit the road again, and I can't wait.